Beneath the quiet exterior, INFJs hold deep convictions about the weightier matters of life. Those who are activists — INFJs gravitate toward such a role — are there for the cause, not for personal glory or political power.
INFJs are champions of the oppressed and downtrodden. They often are found in the wake of an emergency, rescuing those who are in acute distress. INFJs may fantasize about getting revenge on those who victimize the defenseless. The concept of ‘poetic justice’ is appealing to the INFJ.
“There’s something rotten in Denmark.” Accurately suspicious about others’ motives, INFJs are not easily led. These are the people that you can rarely fool any of the time. Though affable and sympathetic to most, INFJs are selective about their friends. Such a friendship is a symbiotic bond that transcends mere words.
INFJs have a knack for fluency in language and facility in communication. In addition, nonverbal sensitivity enables the INFJ to know and be known by others intimately.
Writing, counseling, public service and even politics are areas where INFJs frequently find their niche.
INFJs are distinguished by both their complexity of character and the unusual range and depth of their talents. Strongly humanitarian in outlook, INFJs tend to be idealists, and because of their J preference for closure and completion, they are generally “doers” as well as dreamers. This rare combination of vision and practicality often results in INFJs taking a disproportionate amount of responsibility in the various causes to which so many of them seem to be drawn.
INFJs are deeply concerned about their relations with individuals as well as the state of humanity at large. They are, in fact, sometimes mistaken for extroverts because they appear so outgoing and are so genuinely interested in people — a product of the Feeling function they most readily show to the world. On the contrary, INFJs are true introverts, who can only be emotionally intimate and fulfilled with a chosen few from among their long-term friends, family, or obvious “soul mates.” While instinctively courting the personal and organizational demands continually made upon them by others, at intervals INFJs will suddenly withdraw into themselves, sometimes shutting out even their intimates. This apparent paradox is a necessary escape valve for them, providing both time to rebuild their depleted resources and a filter to prevent the emotional overload to which they are so susceptible as inherent “givers.” As a pattern of behavior, it is perhaps the most confusing aspect of the enigmatic INFJ character to outsiders, and hence the most often misunderstood — particularly by those who have little experience with this rare type.
Due in part to the unique perspective produced by this alternation between detachment and involvement in the lives of the people around them, INFJs may well have the clearest insights of all the types into the motivations of others, for good and for evil. The most important contributing factor to this uncanny gift, however, are the empathic abilities often found in Fs, which seem to be especially heightened in the INFJ type (possibly by the dominance of the introverted N function).
This empathy can serve as a classic example of the two-edged nature of certain INFJ talents, as it can be strong enough to cause discomfort or pain in negative or stressful situations. More explicit inner conflicts are also not uncommon in INFJs; it is possible to speculate that the causes for some of these may lie in the specific combinations of preferences which define this complex type. For instance, there can sometimes be a “tug-of-war” between NF vision and idealism and the J practicality that urges compromise for the sake of achieving the highest priority goals. And the I and J combination, while perhaps enhancing self-awareness, may make it difficult for INFJs to articulate their deepest and most convoluted feelings.
Usually self-expression comes more easily to INFJs on paper, as they tend to have strong writing skills. Since in addition they often possess a strong personal charisma, INFJs are generally well-suited to the “inspirational” professions such as teaching (especially in higher education) and religious leadership. Psychology and counseling are other obvious choices, but overall, INFJs can be exceptionally difficult to pigeonhole by their career paths. Perhaps the best example of this occurs in the technical fields. Many INFJs perceive themselves at a disadvantage when dealing with the mystique and formality of “hard logic”, and in academic terms this may cause a tendency to gravitate towards the liberal arts rather than the sciences. However, the significant minority of INFJs who do pursue studies and careers in the latter areas tend to be as successful as their T counterparts, as it is *iNtuition* — the dominant function for the INFJ type — which governs the ability to understand abstract theory and implement it creatively.
In their own way, INFJs are just as much “systems builders” as are INTJs; the difference lies in that most INFJ “systems” are founded on human beings and human values, rather than information and technology. Their systems may for these reasons be conceptually “blurrier” than analogous NT ones, harder to measure in strict numerical terms, and easier to take for granted — yet it is these same underlying reasons which make the resulting contributions to society so vital and profound.
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INFJ children have two sides. They can be gregarious and very much involved in the world of people, as well as quiet, imaginative, and in their own world. One INFJ child described her favorite summer and how it reflected those two sides. She loved to go to the library and did so every other day, devouring two to three books between each trip. She also very much enjoyed her neighborhood friends and the adventures that they would have together. They collected bones and rocks that they found on a farm at the edge of town and painted them with white shoe polish. They then scattered the bones in her yard and played at being archaeologists on a dig.
INFJ children are gentle and often abhor violence, especially in their childhood games. An INFJ created his own swords, but he would not use them in games against other children because he was frightened by the potential of being too aggressive and of hurting them. It was the creativity involved in making the swords that intrigued him, not the actual use of them.
As teenagers, INFJs look for a small group of people who understand and appreciate them. Without this support, they can feel isolated from others. INFJs who do not find a supportive social group may find the teen years to be somewhat difficult for them because of peer pressure to be “popular” and activity oriented. They are not likely to enjoy large parties, but prefer intimate groups of close and long..standing friends. They may participate and even lead in such things as academic activities, yearbook, and newspaper, because these activities allow them to express outwardly their regard for others and enable them to exercise their creativity.
Many INFJs who have the opportunity gravitate toward higher education, where they often find their niche and “place in the sun. ” With their intellectual bent, they are led to endeavors that allow them to deal with theory and complexity. Professors often spot their intellectual inclination and encourage it. One INFJ stated, “I was often singled out as the student most likely to care about what my professors were saying.” An INFJ engineering student with excellent grades was invited by his professor to be a research assistant. This led the INFJ into a new field, different from what he might have pursued. This new field, solar energy, fit with his ideal that effective heating could be obtained without necessarily depleting the Earth’s natural resources. This also fit with his value of conservation, which focused on keeping the world as beautiful a place for future generations as it is today.
INFJs often settle early into a career choice and diligently apply themselves to the career’s requirements. This same diligent pattern applies when selecting other important things in their lives, such as where to live, who to marry, and what activities are worthy of their dedication.
INFJs have an internal picture of how they would like their work to contribute to the general good. For example, an INFJ home economics teacher was particularly interested in family living. Her lifelong dream was to have her own day,care business. However, she was also very loyal to her teaching job because there, too, she was making life better for others. When she was laid off from her teaching job, she began to seriously look at her day,care dream. Things quickly fell into place, and she started her business with eight children. In three years time, the business had grown to forty children. She would not increase it further because that would result in a reduction of the personal relationships with parents, children, and staff. Her program was known for its gentle, compassionate, and innovative learning atmosphere and quickly became a model for other programs.
Because of her involvement in her teaching, she did not activate her daycare,center dream until she was led into it by being laid off.
INFJs are committed more to their ideas than to any individual organization. One INFJ knew early on that her “mission” was writing. It took her many years to find a subject matter-home health care-that warranted her time and energy. When she did find one, she started her own newsletter relating to it.
If they are in an appropriate career area, INFJs may reap the rewards of their insight and hard work. Because of their future-focus, their people orientation, and their push toward task completion, they may rise to positions of responsibility.
INFJs tend to believe that if their ideas are sound, those ideas will carry them through their lives. As a result, retirement will take care of itself. They may vary in the amount of actual planning they have done for this stage of their lives. INFJs look forward to nurturing family relationships, to grandchildren, and to seeing the foundations that they have made for themselves flourish. They anticipate the time when they can engage in hobbies without interruptions and have peace and quiet for reflection. Retirement also gives them the opportunity to become further involved in interests that they have developed over their lifetimes. For example, INFJs who earlier pursued writing as a hobby will be able to indulge in it. INFJs who raised children can continue to enjoy those relationships, with ample time to devote to them.
